Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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