But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
