its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize