My friends, they love my intelligence
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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