with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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