There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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