the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
this just has baby written all over it
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
