You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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