Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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