the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
