we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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