it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
