he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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