She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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