Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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