Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
