Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
