Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
