I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
And then he peed in my hair
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