I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize
