Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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