I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
