I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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