Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
