Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
