I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize