Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
