I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize
