so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
