His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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