I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize