u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
