also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
