We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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