I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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