Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
