sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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