her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
