you win again, gameday.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
