he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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