whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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