i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
