I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
