He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
