will power is for people who don't want to get laid
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
