I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
organizing the empties. That sober.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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