how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
