Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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