i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
