Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
