How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
time to smoke my breakfast
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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