I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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