It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
